Susie Dent the lexicographer from the television programme Countdown. | Facebook

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I notice that Susie Dent the lexicographer (look it up!) from the television programme Countdown has been having a go at meaningless modern expressions that drive the more sensitive souls amongst us completely barmy. Indeed, when watching the television or listening to the wireless I will occasionally explode when yet another celebrity talks about his or her sodding ‘journey’ or describes another barely recognisable celebrity as ‘iconic’ when quite clearly they are nothing of the sort?

While I’m at it, why do people insist on saying some of the following irritatingly meaningless phrases, such as ‘…at this point in time’ - what’s wrong with saying - ‘Now’? I hope it isn’t just me who finds certain modern-day language as annoying as I certainly do - however, it appears that Ms Dent (as mentioned earlier) has been gathering undeniable evidence that increasing numbers of us are addicted to talking marginal rubbish in an effort to appear very ‘now’ - please God forgive me! I do know however, that every generation by its very nature, has to rearrange the English language to some extent so as to reflect its own linguistic attitude. Nevertheless, as someone who’s verbal incontinence sometimes reflects his own poorly constructed and wasteful early years, I’m aghast at some of the modern dumbing-down of our common language in all its various forms.

Dear Lord, I am no snob - but, listening to a popular radio programme nowadays can be a painful experience for anyone who likes to hear English clearly spoken - without all manner of added and newly expressed verbal diarrhoea. For instance, where did the expressions - “It is what it is“ and “I’m not gonna lie” come from? In fact, I would personally de-friend anyone who would use ‘reaching out’ instead of ‘getting in touch.’ Am I over-reacting I wonder, which has been a particular weakness of mine in the past? Well, I don’t think so - because all the time someone is - ‘moving forward whilst harvesting low hanging fruit” I’d like to say - ‘Aw, bless.’ ‘No disrespect just saying, innit.’

Come on then, Mallorca Bulletin reader, I bet you could easily make a list of modern terminology that drives you completely bonkers. From every sentence that opens with the word ‘So’ - to the continual and aggravating use of the simple word ‘Like’ - almost everywhere; ‘aaaww bless’, it’s really annoying. ‘No disrespect’, just saying! I know that many of you will think this minor obsession of mine, is just that - a nerdish obsession. But mark my words these things matter, they really do. For instance why is it that most professional footballers and commentators can rarely enunciate the letters ’T or R’ at their post-match interviews? Moreover, these verbal aberrations are continually morphing into even worse uses of our wonderful English language. Question - ‘Do you know what…?’ - No I don’t bloody-well know what! Then there is the whole business of saying things such as ‘I’m not gonna to lie’ as this is an invitation to listening to a massive fib, or much worse. Mind you, the words ‘with all due respect’ usually mean the exact opposite nowadays. So then, in conclusion - what we have here is a ‘win-win situation’ - right? Simples. - full stop!